Living life: natural cycles or ratrace?

Full flat in the ratrace

Time is an artificial thing. At least, clock time is. And yet it has been leading me, big time, lately. Instead of me leading my life, my space, my time, in my own way. What if time wouldn't exist?', my bonus daughter asked me, randomly, a while ago. 'What do you think the world would look like?'. The question resonated so much with me. Why? I know why, because lately I fell in the ‘ratrace pitfall’....again, full flat.

The flip side of purpose

It is a strange thing. Whenever I am connected to my essence, to my purpose, living life feels effortlessly…and very productive and joyful. So one would think, that that should be incentive enough to stay out of the ratrace, right ;-)? And then something happens in in the world and I get overwhelmed. And that ‘something’ can be anything from disasters in nature, the decade of restoration being announced, seeing teachers striking for better education or the ample opportunities I see to make the world a better place for everybody. In those very moments, my purpose strongly connects to those issues, almost gets sucked in. And I immediately feel a call for action. And then it goes wrong. Because in the process of feeling called to action, the collective becomes more important than myself (or rather my Self :-)). And I start running, anxiously, impatiently, inefficiently. Because I do feel a strong sense of urgency. And I feel a responsibility to act, because I can. ‘You can only do big, if you can do small’, someone told me recently. And I know that is true. And there is a big difference between knowing and acting like it…

Disconnecting from myself

What happens inside of me in those moments, is that I actually, funny enough, disconnect from my essence. And of course that has the exact opposite effect of what I want. I become less joyful, less productive and effortless is certainly not a word that applies to me in those phases. I get stuck in the ratrace. The Cambridge dictionary explains ratrace as: ‘a way of life in modern society in which people compete with each other for power and money’. What I experience, is more a competition within myself when entering a ‘ratrace phase’. A competition between my ‘authentic, natural, connected me’ and my ‘stressed, responsible, disconnected me’. It is not about money or power: it is about living my purpose and sometimes becoming too serious in doing so. I get trapped (trap myself?) into self imposed deadlines, self imposed expectations and self imposed constraints. At the same time, deep inside of me, there is this longing for space, for moving along with the seasons, for being able to go with the flow, living in the now, living freely. It is so frustrating!

Nature’s lessons

In nature, animals don’t impose frustration on themselves, they don’t plan their life in a time schedule. Imagine a lion planning a kill like we plan our Christmas dinner two months in advance: 'where shall we plan to kill, what animal and who shall we invite to join?'. Nature is neither that demanding for itself nor for its surroundings, doesn't want more all the time and isn't unhappy. In nature everything just is. And nature is about cycles: seasons come and go, animals migrate following food, dark and light is a natural cycle, tides are a natural cycle. Life is about cycles. 

Every time I realise this and take a deep breath, I relax and feel connected again. What a shame, that we are not used to living in natural cycles anymore! Winter, in nature, is about saving energy, turning inwards. In spring, everything starts to grow and blossom. In summer, animals lazily enjoy the sun, warming their skin. And in autumn it is time to let go: of leaves, of flowers, of fruits. Is it that hard to remember this and live accordingly? Apparently…to me at least and I see it a lot around me, certainly in this part of the world.

Moments to reconnect

Luckily, I am going hiking in Ireland in a week, surrounded by nature. Time to leave the ratrace, to reset, get back connected to myself, to my natural state of being. In nature, I find it easiest to reconnect. And I know it is important to create those moments in our day to day life as well. Even more important actually, because when we integrate those moments, the pitfall of the ratrace is less likely to get you. And joy, effortless, efficiency and, last but certainly not least, health, are more likely to stay with you. Because it is more attractive to be around people that are connected to themselves, even for values ;-). That is probably, why I planned those moments to reconnect to nature and your own nature in everything I organise this year. I would love for all people to have those moments, to integrate them in your day to day life. And it is a recurring reminder for myself ;-).

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Am I a colonizer, a human or a tourist?